Ma

I combed my hair and remembered the many times I fought with Ma for making by hair too tight or too loose. Many a times when I rushed for work with uncombed hair, she would look at me and ask me to fix it. I would say don’t worry I will do that in office, it will mess up anyways. She may not have figured out how I turned out to be so careless when she has been dainty all her life.

She asked for hair oil and I don't know if she used it off late. I would ask her to oil and message my oil as I wanted that she exercise her fingers.

I arranged the washed clothes and thought of every moment when she did it. Today I will have to do it. I scolded her so many things for sending some of my clothes to laundry, I would ask her to keep all in one place and let me decide which to send. Today I have to do it all by myself. She would look at my cupboard and tell me how messy it was, today I am not gaining the strength to look at it. I will need to clean it eventually. I remember with some fondness and a lot of pain how she told me that I didn’t keep a track of what all clothes I had.

Remembered the Sandhya Deeya and Dhoop and know from the core of my heart that she taught me this. Know how she would call me in our Shillong home and no matter what we were doing we had to be present for it. Her blessings were there for all of us, now I have to try and feel that invisible hand.

The evening tea! She would ask me if I wanted to drink and I would say yes. Almost Always! I am trying to maintain this as a ritual, even if it's just me or just two of us.